There is something wrong with me. I’m constantly afflicted with this uneasy feeling. It drags me down during the day. It keeps me up at night. It is completely unhealthy and yet it is the one thing that keeps me living. How can something control my life but take it away at the same time? My life is imprisoned in purgatory in which ultimate triumph is within my grasp but failure... Read More

A little after one in the Morning.

I open my mouth and I watch as the smoke dances it’s way into the cold. It slithers and swirls as it serenades my senses. The nicotine numbs my mind as my body relaxes, joyfully digesting the dose. I close my eyes and lean my head against the wall, letting out a deep exhale as it pushes the rest of the poison out of my system. I am calm. My breathing is lethargic, and my legs... Read More

Don’t Take the Girl

When I was young, growing up in good ole’ Texas, I listened to country. Who didn’t?  I never knew how to set my radio station correctly when I was younger, so my older sister, who was a “kicker”, a Texan term for country folk, would set it for me. My sister had it all. Country like a mofo. Even me. Cowboy boots and the hat at one point in my life. But anyways,... Read More

Insomnia.

Here I am. Staring blankly at the clock as it reads 4:20 AM. I have to wake up for work in less than three hours, but yet… here I am.  It’s been another night of tossing and turning. I can’t sleep. These nights have become frequent in the last month and it’s finally starting to catch up to me. My sleeping is irregular. My eating is different. My eyes are... Read More